Random blog post #2

I spent most of last week in New York City, visiting old friends of mine from my first year of college at Barnard. 

Upon returning to LA, I've been thinking about where I would ideally like to live after college. I've been obsessively comparing the two cities and thinking about what they each have to offer. I am from LA and so I naturally have a bias. I think of Manhattan as being harsh, dark, and somewhat bleak (in the winter months, at least).  And yet, despite all of the negative adjectives I may use to describe my perception of the city, I feel compelled to go back there. Manhattan has cast a certain spell over me (which I can't quite understand logically), but it is to the extent that I am considering living there after college. 

I lived on the Upper West Side during my freshman year of college. It was my first experience being away from home and in hindsight, I'm happy I did it. But while I was there, I was fixated on the pain and darkness of winter. I felt so controlled by the seasons and by the darkness of November through February. I set count-downs on my phone to look ahead to my next flight home, back to LA, back to feeling lighter again. 

Although I am consciously aware of that experience, I am emotionally immersed in the idea of moving back. I feel this energy in New York... this spirit of possibility and opportunity. It's this sense that I can create anything and everything is possible. I don't feel that way in LA. It's beautiful and peaceful and all of that, but I don't feel the same sense of drive or ambition as I do in New York.